I spent my first weekend in absolute and total wilderness. Took off Saturday morning about 6 a.m. and drove to Lone Rock, Wisconsin. Basically, the middle of no where with a river and 10 canoes for 20 people. We met up at the Waz Inn, your typical Wisconsin dive bar complete with happily married couple in at 10 a.m. drinking, chain smoking and telling us about their flooded basement. There were also gizzards on the menu.
The first day was basically floating down the river and drinking beer, meeting up with other floating degenerates and being introduced to a "noodle bong". A beer bong made out of a swim noodle. Classy. Docked for the night on a very large sandbar, ate some salty pork products cooked over a fire, drank more beer and passed out in my leaky, sand-filled tent. I awoke the next morning to my tent collapsing on me in the wind, and a puddle of water beneath me. Unphased, we set off again as the water has rose about 5 feet overnight and we soon will no longer have an island.
Waters were rough, and what normally is a leisurely float down the river to our final destination, ended up being a 3 hour rowing battle against 40 mph winds. So much a battle, that I couldn't even stop to put on sun lotion for fear that we would capsize. Got off the river 4 miles early because it was so dangerous. Will I go next year? Not sure. Maybe when my bruises heal, my sunburn scales off and I don't feel like I'm in a canoe when I lay down to sleep...then I'll think about it.
On a side note, ravished and our buzz wearing off we missed the Old Country Buffet and opted instead for the Country Market Buffet on the way home. Never, ever, confuse the two because you end up sadly disappointed. The salad bar's only vegetation contents were iceberg lettuce and cucumbers. The rest, from what I can remember was coleslaw, noodle salad, salsa (yes, salsa), jalapeños, some jarred pickles and other unmentionables. The clincher? A GIANT tub of butter in the middle of the salad bar. Instead of tomatoes, it's a giant tub of butter...and no bread. Wisconsin, you amaze me.
The first day was basically floating down the river and drinking beer, meeting up with other floating degenerates and being introduced to a "noodle bong". A beer bong made out of a swim noodle. Classy. Docked for the night on a very large sandbar, ate some salty pork products cooked over a fire, drank more beer and passed out in my leaky, sand-filled tent. I awoke the next morning to my tent collapsing on me in the wind, and a puddle of water beneath me. Unphased, we set off again as the water has rose about 5 feet overnight and we soon will no longer have an island.
Waters were rough, and what normally is a leisurely float down the river to our final destination, ended up being a 3 hour rowing battle against 40 mph winds. So much a battle, that I couldn't even stop to put on sun lotion for fear that we would capsize. Got off the river 4 miles early because it was so dangerous. Will I go next year? Not sure. Maybe when my bruises heal, my sunburn scales off and I don't feel like I'm in a canoe when I lay down to sleep...then I'll think about it.
On a side note, ravished and our buzz wearing off we missed the Old Country Buffet and opted instead for the Country Market Buffet on the way home. Never, ever, confuse the two because you end up sadly disappointed. The salad bar's only vegetation contents were iceberg lettuce and cucumbers. The rest, from what I can remember was coleslaw, noodle salad, salsa (yes, salsa), jalapeños, some jarred pickles and other unmentionables. The clincher? A GIANT tub of butter in the middle of the salad bar. Instead of tomatoes, it's a giant tub of butter...and no bread. Wisconsin, you amaze me.
The "Free Candy Meth Van" that we rented the canoe from.
Two days of this. Notice the tipping canoe in the background.
Everyone loved the flag on my canoe, gotta represent.
Little to no impact.
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