Lately it's been hard for me to focus. This is not a normal problem I'm used to having. It seems at any given point, there are a million things going on in my life. A million people to call, a million jobs to apply for, a million publications I need to read, and how in the hell can I get some time to pick up dinner? I've felt the most scatter-brained I've felt ever...wondering where it's coming from? I am able to do what I need to do, and of course do it well, but this small part of my brain is off in space telling me, "There are some things to take care of you aren't addressing." These things I realize, are not as simple as picking up some milk. They are, "What will do you do when you finish school?", "When are you going to quit your job?", "How will you find something to replace the current?" and "Should you move back to Berlin?"
These are not questions I actively want to address, as as a result they are seeping in an making little knocking noises at the front of my forehead. Tick. Tick. Tick.
For as long as I can remember I always knew where I was going and what I wanted to do, this is truly a crossroad where I don't even have an intutitive feeling on where to go, which petrifies me. I'm fearful of some dramatic downfall and I find myself in retail selling those ridiculous 70's multicolored maternity wear shirts that are in fashion right now. Okay, that probably won't happen, but still, if I don't decide something soon, make some sort of change - it's going downhill. I have a tendency to flee in the face of seriousness, run like the wind when something important needs to be addressed. I go somewhere to clear my head, and clear it but don't look back. I leave for three weeks to Europe the end of May. Maybe I had a feeling this was all coming my way. This time though, I'm coming home and making some damn choices.
That's enough serious time, here's some Hot Chip.
These are not questions I actively want to address, as as a result they are seeping in an making little knocking noises at the front of my forehead. Tick. Tick. Tick.
For as long as I can remember I always knew where I was going and what I wanted to do, this is truly a crossroad where I don't even have an intutitive feeling on where to go, which petrifies me. I'm fearful of some dramatic downfall and I find myself in retail selling those ridiculous 70's multicolored maternity wear shirts that are in fashion right now. Okay, that probably won't happen, but still, if I don't decide something soon, make some sort of change - it's going downhill. I have a tendency to flee in the face of seriousness, run like the wind when something important needs to be addressed. I go somewhere to clear my head, and clear it but don't look back. I leave for three weeks to Europe the end of May. Maybe I had a feeling this was all coming my way. This time though, I'm coming home and making some damn choices.
That's enough serious time, here's some Hot Chip.
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